All Is Crumbling
by RandomKiwi
Summary: "Please stop pretending like there's nothing wrong." A one-shot based on my reaction to the 4x04 promo. Just getting the angsty feels out. Bring tissues.


**AN: Just a quick one-shot to get my angst out of me. I'm due for a lot of updates for 'Candles' and I'd rather not have this whole 4x04 thing distracting me whilst I write those ones. So, not my best work by far... Just a sort of way to channel the Klaine angst and such until Thursday. I might write a part two of this, just to tie up any loose ends... We'll see. Well, I'll see before you do. :P So, I cried a lot writing this which had a lot to do with the concept and also my playlist which goes as** follows:  
**- Don't Speak by No Doubt  
-** **Teenage Dream (Acoustic) - Darren Criss**  
**- Just Give Me A Reason - P!nk**  
**- It's For The Best - Straylight Run**  
- **Run by Snow Patrol  
**- **Existentialism On Prom Night by Straylight Run  
- Never Say Never - The Fray  
I got the title from 'NSN' in case you were curious. So, I hope you enjoy this... But, because of its nature, not too much. Reviews are lovely, if you'd be so kind as to leave one! Updates for other fics coming soon; I promise! (We'll get through this disaster of 4x04 and the hiatus together, guys. 3)  
~ RandomKiwi  
**

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN GLEE OR ANY NAMES/PERSONS AFFILIATED WITH THE SHOW. (Sadly...)  
**

* * *

"Please stop pretending like there's nothing wrong."

Those seven words just about killed the curly haired boy. He hadn't been himself the whole night, but he hadn't expected Kurt to even notice. His boyfriend hadn't noticed how detached he'd been feeling ever since their most recent Skype date, about a week prior to today… It's as if his countless voicemails, calls, and texts meant nothing to Kurt any more. And that… That stung. That stung a lot.

After going without contact for a few days, Blaine had finally conjured up a solution. Well, not so much of a solution as a way to protect himself, to protect both of them from the inevitable. The distance was eating away at their relationship; it didn't take a rocket scientist to make that observation. There wasn't _KurtandBlaine_ any more… Just Kurt… and Blaine. The separation was slowly destroying what little connection they had left. Watching Kurt gradually pull away from him was one of the most painful things Blaine had to witness this school year. Sending Kurt off to New York had seemed like a good idea. The distance was agonizing, but his boyfriend deserved the best… The best was definitely anything but being stuck in Lima, Ohio.

Seeing Kurt achieve the start of his dreams couldn't make Blaine feel more proud. Yet a part of him couldn't help but zero in on the downside of it all. Kurt's demands from work were increasing. He was making new friends, new ties… He was starting fresh. _Without Blaine._ That's what hurt the most. He was a burden, just an extra add-on to Kurt's busy, busy lifestyle. Busy… That was it. Kurt was never not busy.

Blaine took a breath, turning to face Kurt. He gazed into those gorgeous glass eyes, knowing that they wouldn't be his to lose himself in much longer. Not after tonight.

"That's… That's the thing, Kurt… It's _not_." His words came out pained, strangled, broken; just like his heart. "You're here, in New York, starting a new life. New friends, new dreams, a new everything. You're busy in this fantastic city, and I get it. I really, really do."

"Get what, Blaine? What is there to get?" Kurt's face scrunched up as it always did when he was confused. Blaine found it most adorable… But he'd have to learn to stop.

Blaine let out a shaky breath. His honey-hazel eyes became misty with tears. He bowed his head, tearing his eyes away from Kurt's.

"You're m-moving on." His voice was barely audible as it cracked. The truth in the statement was prominent and easy to register. Kurt didn't need Blaine; he'd proven it many times before, but this… This brought it fully to Blaine's attention. The ignored calls, the lack of consideration, the way New York was so brilliant and Blaine just… wasn't.

"No… No, no, no…. Blaine, don't do this," Kurt begged, tightening his grip on his boyfriend's hand. "Why would you…? I'm not… I love you so much, Blaine. You're my world. You're my universe; you're my everything."

At this, Blaine felt his heart shatter within his chest. "Am I?" he managed to muster the two excruciatingly painful words.

"Of _course_ you are. Blaine… I love you more than words can describe. The distance is tough, but we're nearly halfway through… We can make it. I know we can, we just have to-" Kurt was cut off by Blaine's quiet, sorrowful voice.

"Why haven't you been answering my calls or texts? And my emails, Kurt… You've been completely shutting me out for the past week."

Said boy froze, unsure of how to answer Blaine's questions. He bit his lip, unable to fathom an explanation. Why did he neglect to answer them? Why did he constantly hit the 'ignore' button on Blaine's phone calls and never reply to his texts?

"I've left voicemails, tons of them. I call you every day and text you every chance I get. You're online on Skype but when I call, you never pick up," Blaine continued, searching Kurt's eyes and expression for something… Something that could answer this; something that could either mend or break them. "It's like…. It's like you're ashamed of me… Are you?" His voice dipped to a low whisper.

Kurt worried his lip between his teeth, looking away. He couldn't answer… He just couldn't. How could Blaine think that? How could he possibly come to the conclusion that he was _ashamed_ of them; _ashamed _of what they had?

That was all the confirmation Blaine needed. He shook his head, retracting his hand from Kurt's grip. "I can't, Kurt…" he murmured, the tears stinging the back of his eyes as they began to spill over. At the loss of contact, Blaine felt as though he'd just been torn in half.

"You can't what?" Kurt asked under his breath, eyes wide. He very well knew, but he didn't want to believe it. He wanted to wake up, have this be a bad dream… He desperately needed to wake up in Blaine's arms and have his boyfriend hold him and kiss the tears away… He _needed Blaine. _Without Blaine, there was no point to anything.

"I can't _do this_ anymore, Kurt." Blaine began to back away from his boyfriend – soon to be ex-boyfriend – and shook his head. The tears streamed down his cheeks in wet drops, leaving behind trails of sadness, despair, and hopelessness.

Kurt brought a hand up to his mouth, letting out a strangled sob. "No, Blaine… Don't do this, please, _please,_ don't do this… I love you, please, we can work this out we can fix things, just-"

"We _can't_, Kurt… Don't you understand? I can't keep doing this. You're in New York, the city of dreams, and I'll be back in Lima and I just… I can't… You're in a city with so many opportunities and so many people… You've finally got your dreams within reach and I can't be a burden to that. I can't be the tether that holds you back from your future."

Kurt stepped forward, instinctively reaching out to caress Blaine's cheek. The gesture only broke Blaine's heart more. Knowing that he was leaving Kurt, leaving _everything_, tore him to bits.

"_Blaine. _You _are_ my future… You _are_ my dream… Why can't you see that?" He was desperately trying to hold on to what they had; frantically trying to make things right. It was clear that it wasn't working.

Blaine just shook his head, letting out a labored breath as the tears continued to fall. "I'm sorry…" He stepped out of Kurt's embrace. "This is for the best…"

Kurt watched, defeated, as Blaine made the walk down the pathway they'd come, retracing their steps. He did the only thing he could do… The curly haired boy ran away and he never looked back. With each step, he erased the previous, until eventually he would go back to the start… Back to the place where it all began. _Alone._

In that moment, Kurt Elizabeth Hummel felt himself break. His world shattered, crumbling down upon him in large, gigantic pieces. He reached out towards Blaine, as if he could stop him from leaving… As if he could stop him from saying goodbye. His fingertips met only empty air; there was nothing to hold on to. _He had nothing._

Kurt's whole life was slipping from his grasp, sifting through his fingertips like grains of sand. The memories and promises made were too much.

* * *

_The two stood in the courtyard of William McKinley High School, sharing a tight embrace._

"_I'm never saying goodbye to you," Kurt murmured, on the verge of tears. _

_What never occurred to him was that maybe he'd never have to… Maybe Blaine would do all of the work for him._

* * *

_Kurt and Blaine were snuggling on Kurt's living room couch, watching 'The Notebook' together. Burt and Carole were at work and Finn was at Rachel's. Blaine snaked his arms around Kurt's waist, holding him close._

"_Don't you ever let me go," Kurt had whispered, snuggling into Blaine's chest._

"_I wouldn't think of it," Blaine murmured back, pressing a gentle kiss to Kurt's forehead. _

* * *

He couldn't force himself to remember anything else... He just fucking _couldn't._

The chestnut haired boy collapsed onto the sidewalk, paying no mind to the dirt that would stain his clothing. It didn't matter how many eyes were watching him as the sobs wracked through his body, causing his shoulders to shake violently. It didn't matter how many people were whispering, pointing, sharing moments of confusion as they watched the nineteen year old break down.

None of it mattered because he had lost Blaine.

Blaine had said goodbye.

_Blaine had let go._


End file.
